Focusing Inward

I don’t know if it’s due to the season, or if it’s more related to my pregnancy, but I’m finding myself focusing inward.  The rhythm of my days have changed dramatically over the past month or so, and for the better.  Time is being filled with holiday crafting, with our Advent activities, with cozy afternoon naps snuggled together with my son, with play dates and family gatherings, with quiet peaceful evenings at home.

I don’t think I’ve ever been quite this content.

Unfortunately for this little blog, my blogging has fallen by the wayside.  My husband has been getting up with Shane in the morning, allowing me the luxury of a little extra sleep. And I’ve been shutting the computer down in the evenings, choosing to either snuggle up on the couch under one of my grandmother’s afghans,watching TV with my husband.  And more often than not, nap times have been spent napping, rather than sneaking onto the computer.

If I’m not napping with Shane, rather than sitting down in front of the computer, I’ve been settling in with my journal.  It’s pages have been filling with with my hopes and fears surrounding this upcoming birth, and with my regrets about the circumstances of Shane’s birth.  I’ve been writing about my desire to make changes in my life — to simplify, to want less, to live in the moment.  I’ve been reflecting on who I am,who I’ve been, and who I hope to be.

It’s awe-inspiring, how a simple pen, a book of blank pages, and uninterrupted quiet time can be so therapeutic, so thought-provoking, and so revealing.  I’d like to say that I’m back to blogging regularly again…but I may find myself baring my soul in my journal just as often.  There are times when you just need to focus yourself inwards, and I’m so very thankful to have that creative and emotional outlet available to me.